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Anything Nice to Say: Dark Shadows

Another day, another reboot. What 70s TV show haven’t we taken a stab at? Ah, the almost forgotten vampire soap opera. Tim Burton gives Johnny Depp his first vampiric role in this reboot that left much to be desired?I don’t know. Hardcore Dark Shadows fans can leave a comment.

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Anything Nice to Say: Underworld Blood Wars

Kate Beckinsale returns for the fifth installment of the Underworld franchise, a franchise boasting diminishing returns in critics scores. Should you buckle up for this sequel? Or just let me tell you what you missed. We find anything nice to say about Underworld Blood Wars.

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Anything Nice to Say: Blade Trinity

Pre-MCU Marvel seemed to have a problem with 3rd installments. Spider-man 3, X-men 3, Blade 3, all were poorly received. We try to find anything nice to say about Blade: Trinity.

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Physics Optional: Underworld Awakening Review

I have been firmly lodged in the Underworld cult since the first movie. Perhaps it was because I was young and impressionable, but when I saw Kate Beckinsale drop a hundred feet off the roof of some Gothic building in Prague…I suppose you can say you had me at leather trenchcoat. There’s something about her […]

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My So-called (Immortal) Life

I love vampires. I mean, really. I love high-holy asskickery. I love moral qualms. I love vicious sociopathic killers. I love those looking for redemption. My only criteria seems to be they have the potential for immortal life and feed off some aspect of humanity, be it blood, emotion, or culture. So, I present to […]

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